you asked me yesterday how many good men i was looking for. i said just one more. and when i found the one today, you asked how many now. i said just one more. tomorrow i will find the one and you are going to ask me the same question. i will say just one more.

i’m still running…and i want to fly soon. i’m not dead and will not be anytime soon. keep me in your prayers…

The cries were heard
The bliss was communal
The cradle was rocked
The sustenance was wholesome
The T.L.C. was showered
The kinship was established
The future was built
Our lives were complete
Because you came

(this was pretty much written for my minute seven-week-old who had to go.)

this is defintely one of my all-time favourite musicians not just for his folk tunes with simple melodies, but also for his immense lyrical genius in penning intense feelings about issues in tight little pieces of poetry. this one’s one classic piece of José González from his second outing, In Our Nature.

how low are you willing to go before you reach all your selfish goals punch line after punch line leaving us sore leaving us sore absorbed in your ill hustling feeding a monster just feeding a monster invasion after invasian this means war this means war someday you’ll be up to your knees in the shit you seed all the gullible that you mislead won’t be up for it where to will you relocate now that it’s war now that it’s war

santa could not believe his luck
when the purple bells
he had been searching the last eighteen years
dropped right in front of him
while he was chewing his mind on the magazine
as he sat on the loo
that was built on the exact ground
where ten thousand foot soldiers perished in a nuclear attack
which was quite a mishit
on the part of a certain adolf
born of a woman not born of woman.

he picked them up
and fresh memories of
what had happened eighteen years earlier
brought back waves of sorrow
with a tinge of thrill
that could explain why all he could muster there and then
was an ounce of salty tear
from the corner of the left eye
which was the only functional window to the hardened soul
after years of pounding from the loss they labelled inevitable
because of his obstinate attitude and aptitude.

the bells jingled
and he was more than willing
to laugh at his own misfortune
so beautifully wretched
that he could not bear to curse anything or anyone but himself
who had chosen to soften the redness of the sore
that was growing and glowing with honour
from twenty thousand leagues beneath
causing the entire building to rattle with triumph
which was so sorely missed
the last eighteen years of his motherless life on earth.

he gaped

and yawed

and died

a happy lonesome brute.

’tis a must…

I had the curious urge,
But all I could do was to scratch it.

The consciousness oozed from the wound.

If the pain was existent, it should be spelt r-a-i-n,
Because it pelted upwards.

That left me home and pried.

i wrote again.

today, i went.

i met.

Linda Grant from Liverpool.

a few others, including one from Wolverhampton and one from Wales.

we talked.

i had fun.

oh, i also bought and she signed.

i left.

this is the first time for me, really. so naturally, my entire being isn’t sure how to react. the last two days i’ve been having mixed emotions and my mind’s been thinking a lot. past, present or even future. can’t believe it or can’t accept it, i couldn’t really tell the difference. lots of ‘what if’s have been lingering too. i guess it’s just the irrational behaviour under a rational circumstance. is it just someone passing on? no. or is it someone special passing on? not sure. all these afterthoughts probably don’t mean much now. all i can confess is that i miss her. but then again, i might not have felt it if nothing has happened. so it’s the same own cliché, right? appreciate who you have now before a sudden departure arrives.

any comfort from this? not sure too. oh, perhaps, or most definitely, yes. she’s with Him now.

Lying before me
Is a path so less travelled
I’m waiting for you

i stumbled upon a piece of sad news today. i’ve lost a friend. i didn’t know that she was suffering from an illness, and of course, i wasn’t at her funeral. i feel sad, and bad.

The canary stopped
Singing songs of Solomon
Rot stripped its heart bare

dear Marie gave me the Excellent Blog Award. i thank her for this special gift and for believing in my work here.

when i looked at the folks around me, i realised that there are many excellent bloggers with first rate blogs. many of them would have received such an accolade before my votes. hence, i will present this award to the following folks whose prominence might be a little understated:

1. charlieboy
2. han
3. raeofsunshine
4. pj
5. rachel

i need a hug…
not a fug!
so off you fug,
if you aint giving me a hug!

(for that sober sullen drunk at the corner of helen’s bar on 14 feb)